Gravitational Realignment - aka. "Running Fever"

As the great Greek philosopher Fruitius once said, "Running running is so fun, running is for everyone." But I bet Fruitius didn't know about Gravitational Realignment, also known as "Running Fever." This is, as the name suggests, when the planet's gravity shifts from a 180 degree angle to a 175 degree angle. If this were to happen, the human race will never be able to stand still due to gravity always pulling you forward. The result - a continuously running human race. This will cause mankind to either die from exhaustion or from mortal bleeding from worn down stubbed legs. Gravitational Realignment is likely to occur, as all scientists agree, if a highly magnetic asteroid passes within 200,000 miles of the earth which would alter the gravitational pull of the Earth's core. In order to survive this cataclysmic event, one must wear a gravitational realignment suit (complete with boots) which will compensate for the gravitational changes. Please inquire about this suit in the comments as we sell them via this site for a low low price of $20,000 (so worth it!). It comes in 3 themes - Bear, Monkey, and Vampire.